Perceptual Positioning:
Perceptual Positions.
"Think of the awkward incident through the eyes and ears of others; and you will soon find better ways of managing similar occurrences. The steps are easy."
Have you ever dealt with a difficult player, and wondered how you could have done it better? This tip will help you to look at an incident from different viewpoints. This should help you to find ways of managing similar future situations in a much better way.
Consider a single difficult situation that you have been in recently, by thinking about it from three different perspectives:
(1) Yourself (the Referee).
(2) The Player.
(3) An Observer (perhaps an Assessor, manager or a spectator).
These are called Perceptual Positions. When you explore perceptual positions, you will start to develop an ability to experience interaction in a new way.
You will learn to see and to hear, and to feel the relationship through the eyes and the ears and the emotions of the player. You also develop the ability to explore the relationship through the eyes and ears of a neutral observer (a fly on the wall, a hidden video camera, a spectator etc).
When you add these new dimensions to your current self-assessment, you will learn new ways of behaving that will enrich and enhance each and every relationship you have with players. You do this by putting yourself in their shoes, and by asking yourself how you would have felt in the same behavioural situation?
Developing Perceptual Positions:
Step 1 of 6: History:
As you think about a difficult situation, you begin to remember other times when things did not go quite as well as you would have liked them to. As you mull this over in your mind, you start remembering the interaction (history) in greater detail.
Step 2 of 6: Through Your Own Eyes:
First, you see the experience through your own eyes, becoming aware of what trouble the player gave you. You hear the experience through your own ears, listening to what the player is saying, what you are saying out loud, and what you were thinking to yourself at the time. You experience what it is like to be with this player, what you feel about the player, and also about your behaviour and the awkwardness of the interaction. Then you freeze the interaction and notice what you have learnt about yourself. It is here, that you can perceive better ways of dealing with the situation, such as; controlling (or hiding) your emotions; better positioning; ways to be stronger or more polite, and making your instructions clearer for the listener etc.
Step 3 of 6: Through the Player's Eyes:
See the experience through the player's eyes, becoming aware of what you look like from his perspective. You hear the experience through the player's ears, listening to what you are saying. You feel what it is like to be the player, what you feel about yourself from here. Then you freeze the interaction and notice what you have learned about yourself and the player. It is here, that you can imagine what the player thought about you, as you were
dealing with him. Would it have worked better if you had been calmer; or had used different words; or perhaps used more authority; or by being more friendlier and polite etc? Did you really need to embarrass him? These are the
questions seen from the player's perspective. Next time this incident happens, you should now be able to temper your approach to eliminate the things that did not originally work.
Step 4 of 6: Through the Eyes of an Observer:
See the experience through the eyes of an observer who might be neutral. You listen to the Referee and the player talking to one another. You become aware of how they have interacted together previously in the game and notice any patterns and repetitions. Then you freeze the interaction and perceive what you have learned about yourself (the Referee) and the player. Was there a clash of two strong characters? Who was in charge of the situation? Was
the incident resolved in a satisfactory way? How was the anger managed? etc.
Step 5 of 6: Using the new Perceptions to Improve:
By now, you will have lots of additional information that you have gathered about yourself (the Referee), from the player, and from the observer. As you consider all of this information, think about what it is that you could say or do or feel differently that would improve your interaction and values to allow you to shift this interface to a different, and more successful level. This might only be a very small change, or it could lead to a significant change in how you manage future incidents. It might only be one thing or several things that need developing. Some of the things to consider might be a new posture or more friendlier gestures, moving closer to the player or further away, moving next to them or in front of them, changing the look on your face, different words or a new tone of voice, or just feeling differently about the player or yourself.
Step 6 of 6: Test Out the Theory:
Now in your mind, imagine the next time that you will be in a similar situation with this player, except that this time, you have some new behaviours to try out. As you try out these new possibilities in your mind, notice how the player changes the way in which they are behaving. And you begin to realise that you can use these new behaviours whenever you want to, with this player or with other players in future games.
Next time that you have trouble with a particularly awkward incident, analyse it by developing the perceptual positions. Don't just accept that the next incident will be dealt with by you in exactly the same way. Think of the awkward incident through the eyes and ears of others; and you will soon find better ways of managing similar occurrences. The steps are easy:
Step 1: History:
Step 2: Through Your Own Eyes:
Step 3: Through the Player's Eyes:
Step 4: Through the Eyes of an Observer:
Step 5: Using the new Perceptions to Improve:
Step 6: Test Out the Theory:
"Think of the awkward incident through the eyes and ears of others; and you will soon find better ways of managing similar occurrences. The steps are easy."
Have you ever dealt with a difficult player, and wondered how you could have done it better? This tip will help you to look at an incident from different viewpoints. This should help you to find ways of managing similar future situations in a much better way.
Consider a single difficult situation that you have been in recently, by thinking about it from three different perspectives:
(1) Yourself (the Referee).
(2) The Player.
(3) An Observer (perhaps an Assessor, manager or a spectator).
These are called Perceptual Positions. When you explore perceptual positions, you will start to develop an ability to experience interaction in a new way.
You will learn to see and to hear, and to feel the relationship through the eyes and the ears and the emotions of the player. You also develop the ability to explore the relationship through the eyes and ears of a neutral observer (a fly on the wall, a hidden video camera, a spectator etc).
When you add these new dimensions to your current self-assessment, you will learn new ways of behaving that will enrich and enhance each and every relationship you have with players. You do this by putting yourself in their shoes, and by asking yourself how you would have felt in the same behavioural situation?
Developing Perceptual Positions:
Step 1 of 6: History:
As you think about a difficult situation, you begin to remember other times when things did not go quite as well as you would have liked them to. As you mull this over in your mind, you start remembering the interaction (history) in greater detail.
Step 2 of 6: Through Your Own Eyes:
First, you see the experience through your own eyes, becoming aware of what trouble the player gave you. You hear the experience through your own ears, listening to what the player is saying, what you are saying out loud, and what you were thinking to yourself at the time. You experience what it is like to be with this player, what you feel about the player, and also about your behaviour and the awkwardness of the interaction. Then you freeze the interaction and notice what you have learnt about yourself. It is here, that you can perceive better ways of dealing with the situation, such as; controlling (or hiding) your emotions; better positioning; ways to be stronger or more polite, and making your instructions clearer for the listener etc.
Step 3 of 6: Through the Player's Eyes:
See the experience through the player's eyes, becoming aware of what you look like from his perspective. You hear the experience through the player's ears, listening to what you are saying. You feel what it is like to be the player, what you feel about yourself from here. Then you freeze the interaction and notice what you have learned about yourself and the player. It is here, that you can imagine what the player thought about you, as you were
dealing with him. Would it have worked better if you had been calmer; or had used different words; or perhaps used more authority; or by being more friendlier and polite etc? Did you really need to embarrass him? These are the
questions seen from the player's perspective. Next time this incident happens, you should now be able to temper your approach to eliminate the things that did not originally work.
Step 4 of 6: Through the Eyes of an Observer:
See the experience through the eyes of an observer who might be neutral. You listen to the Referee and the player talking to one another. You become aware of how they have interacted together previously in the game and notice any patterns and repetitions. Then you freeze the interaction and perceive what you have learned about yourself (the Referee) and the player. Was there a clash of two strong characters? Who was in charge of the situation? Was
the incident resolved in a satisfactory way? How was the anger managed? etc.
Step 5 of 6: Using the new Perceptions to Improve:
By now, you will have lots of additional information that you have gathered about yourself (the Referee), from the player, and from the observer. As you consider all of this information, think about what it is that you could say or do or feel differently that would improve your interaction and values to allow you to shift this interface to a different, and more successful level. This might only be a very small change, or it could lead to a significant change in how you manage future incidents. It might only be one thing or several things that need developing. Some of the things to consider might be a new posture or more friendlier gestures, moving closer to the player or further away, moving next to them or in front of them, changing the look on your face, different words or a new tone of voice, or just feeling differently about the player or yourself.
Step 6 of 6: Test Out the Theory:
Now in your mind, imagine the next time that you will be in a similar situation with this player, except that this time, you have some new behaviours to try out. As you try out these new possibilities in your mind, notice how the player changes the way in which they are behaving. And you begin to realise that you can use these new behaviours whenever you want to, with this player or with other players in future games.
Next time that you have trouble with a particularly awkward incident, analyse it by developing the perceptual positions. Don't just accept that the next incident will be dealt with by you in exactly the same way. Think of the awkward incident through the eyes and ears of others; and you will soon find better ways of managing similar occurrences. The steps are easy:
Step 1: History:
Step 2: Through Your Own Eyes:
Step 3: Through the Player's Eyes:
Step 4: Through the Eyes of an Observer:
Step 5: Using the new Perceptions to Improve:
Step 6: Test Out the Theory: